I’ve got 6 days of vacation in the OC this week! Happy to be home and hanging out with my family. This has been an interesting couple of months. 6 months ago I was home and got the call to go dance on a 6 month cruise to Alaska and Hawaii. I turned it down to stay in Vegas for the summer. I worried I was making the wrong decision. I think I most definitely made the wrong decision. I know it’s horrible to say, but in a dancer’s life, things can change in an instant and you have to take it. I had to decide if I wanted to move to Vegas in less than 3 days to work at Jubilee, which I took. Why didn’t I take the cruise line?! I stayed in Jubilee for 6 more months and it has been quite a depressing few months. I’m so grateful for the good friends I’ve made who have put up with my whining. I appreciate you. But, if anything, I have learned a few life lessons I want to share in hopes that these words will help a young dancer out there yonder:
1. Yes. You can make the WRONG decision. I thought, lets see how this goes, it will be fine! It was not. I have not been happy in Vegas these past couple months. One thing has led to the next and I did not get news that I wanted this week in regards to a certain job. I am very disappointed. I feel like I missed out on the opportunity of a lifetime and will never get it again. Melodramatic? I don’t know. Certainly feels real right now. I have to keep my head high though and just focus on the future.
2. Things do not come easily to me. Some people have all the luck, don’t they? I am not one of those people. I have to work extra hard to get where I want, and I have to realize that things I want to happen, aren’t going to happen. I have to have Plan A, B, C, and D. I mean, I usually do, but this weekend I gave my notice in at Jubilee. My last day will be September 27. So come and see me in the show before then! It is such a scary feeling to have no job scheduled in the future! I know I will be fine, but as I said, things do not just fall in to my lap like I want them to. It took me at least 10 auditions to get in at Disneyland over a span of a few years, and a year before I got the call at Jubilee. I had to figure things out in the mean time. I should have taken that cruise contract. But hey, everything happens for a reason, right? Maybe I’m just in the middle of it and can’t see what is currently f*#king happening.
3. Staying skinny is stupid and difficult and I like cake. I’m feeling quite finished with the skimpy costumes out here in Las Vegas. I am so not happy with trying to stay skinny, as well as lose weight on top of that! It’s a hard life, and I am so much the gal who likes to make a big sandwich and eat it in my bed while watching hours of TV at the end of the day. I dunno man…I love dancing and performing, but these Jubilee costumes, Pussycat Doll costumes, are cray cray. I am going to try, but I’ve said that for months now, and it is already July 25th. What is wrong with me?!
4. Looking forward to the future. Even though it has been a rough couple of months (moving several times, not booking jobs, being put on weight notice) I have high hopes for the future. I have that feeling when I know something big is about to happen. I have to have it or else there is no point in doing what I do. I want to keep moving on to bigger, better things. I want to have a fatty resume and travel the world. I have a ton of auditions coming up, photo shoot for updated photos, and am looking forward to that big change. Vegas has been wonderful and I am #soblessed to have lived in SIN CITY. Truly. Pools, bars, clubs, parties, 85 gorgeous friends, glitz, glamor, lights, the stage. It has all been a dream. But it’s time for something new.